'We lived within our means': I earned $30,000 as a pastor and still retired comfortably. Why don't you tell people that?

By Quentin Fottrell

'As a country, we have grown dangerously comfortable with living on credit'

"We routinely desire what others have, yet too often lack the self-control or self-awareness to be patient and content with what we can afford." (Photo subject is a model.)

Dear Quentin,

I couldn't help but respond to your article ("I'm 77, pay rent and live off Social Security, but I help homeless people. Why are so many people going hungry?"). I have seen similar essays throughout my eight decades of life, and the subject frustrates me - though perhaps not for the reason you might suspect.

After more than 40 years working in ministry, I retired as a pastor in 2021. My wife and I raised two children. Until my retirement, I never earned more than $30,000 a year. My wife, a dedicated stay-at-home mom, earned a maximum of $13,000 when she was able to work in local school districts.

My frustration isn't with our own circumstances. We did just fine because we lived within our means. What galls me is the failure to identify one of the - certainly not the only - bedrock reasons some people go through life with little or no money: mismanagement.

I had a solid upbringing. My parents had the good sense to say, "Yeah, we'll have to save up for that," if they needed a new car or furniture, or a house repair. As a society, we routinely desire what others have, yet too often lack the self-control or self-awareness to be patient and content with what we can afford.

I spent many years working with churches in West Germany and later in Germany, and I saw a very different attitude toward government assistance. The guidelines are generally more stringent, and there is a stronger expectation that people who can work should do so. There is also, in many countries outside the U.S., a social stigma attached to not seeking employment.

When I was young, I used to marvel at countries whose debt-to-GDP ratios exceeded 120%. Well, here we are.

While my political views are varied, I was astonished by the uproar in September 2025 over congressional changes to SNAP work requirements. At times, I easily worked more than 80 hours in a week in a parish. There are, of course, exemptions for people who are pregnant, have disabilities or are caring for young children.

As a country, we have grown dangerously comfortable with living on credit and trying to maintain lifestyles our budgets cannot support. My father put it well: "There are no instructions printed on a dollar bill." When I was young, I used to marvel at countries whose debt-to-GDP ratios exceeded 120%. Well, here we are.

After retiring from the ministry, I volunteered in local high schools and was stupefied by the lack of financial knowledge among students in the latter stages of their education. There are many reasons people become poor or remain poor. I know that firsthand, having grown up without economic privilege and having worked in neighborhoods blighted by socioeconomic hardship.

I remember helping organize a food bank with several other pastors in the inner city on the Eastern seaboard. We didn't simply hand out food. Anyone who came was welcome to receive an amount appropriate to the size of their household, but the adult representative first had to attend a half-hour seminar covering cooking and money-saving tips.

The food bank was a success and still operates today, having unfortunately outlived two of the congregations that founded it. You, Mr. Fottrell, are far too busy to be bothered by screeds such as this, but I felt this often-neglected point needed to be made. Money mismanagement is an underreported contributor to financial hardship in this country.

Until we are willing to talk about it openly, the problem will persist.

Happily Retired Pastor

You can email The Moneyist with any financial and ethical questions at qfottrell@marketwatch.com. The Moneyist regrets he cannot reply to questions individually.

Related: 'We made a bad, bad decision': I learned the hard way how to manage my aging father's money

No one gets a free pass. We pay for our poor financial decisions, one way or another.

Dear Pastor,

I'm never too busy to listen to a reader's story. Thank you for sharing it.

It takes no small amount of discipline and sacrifice to save for retirement, and to live within your means in order to do that. And, yes, it comes more easily to some than others. Perhaps, given your vocation, you also benefited from a parsonage at some point. Housing is the biggest expense most people face. Accommodation is the biggest expense most people face.

Regardless, you clearly understood the value of a dollar and saw firsthand what can happen if you do fall on hard times through gambling, reckless spending, and lack of saving, not to mention all of those myriad reasons that are beyond the control of many people - mental-health challenges, long recovery from traumatic childhoods, or no access to education or even the expectation of education.

We can, of course, ascribe personal accountability to the millions of people who carry credit-card debt month to month. Some are trying to keep up with the Joneses, there's no doubt, while others are trying to keep up with school fees, medical bills, transportation costs, grocery bills, property taxes, and random bills for leaky roofs and burst pipes. It's a minefield out there.

The malady of wantonness and the disease of 'more' are not exclusive to American shores.

Thankfully, you had a good grounding in financial education from your parents and, probably most helpful of all, they led by example. Plus, you got those lessons during those important formative years. They didn't buy stuff on credit; they waited until they could afford it. The malady of wantonness and the disease of "more" are not exclusive to American shores.

No one gets a free pass. Personal accountability matters. We usually pay for our poor financial decisions, one way or another. But there's a lot of blame and shame around people who are poor and/or in debt. Some people make it out of a childhood of poverty, or manage to avoid disaster after a prolonged splurge or a poor investment decision, and some people don't.

The optimist in me loves the idea that a food bank provides financial education, even if it was a prerequisite to avail of its services. The cynical European in me wonders whether a homeless person who is unable to work due to disability, and suffered an extraordinarily difficult early life that I could not conceive of, would naturally benefit from classes on interest rates, inflation, savings and personal consumption.

Related: 'I don't begrudge them their money': My husband and I have friends who spend, spend, spend. How do we keep up?

Financial education

Financial education is improving in our schools. Some 39 states require personal-finance lessons for high-school graduates, according to the Council for Economic Education Survey of the States. Four states - California, Delaware, Colorado and Hawaii - are now mandating that students take a semester-long personal-finance course before graduating.

At least 18 states require economics for graduation, although some states like Texas and California replaced economics requirements with personal finance. Finance focuses on practical money skills, while economics develops understanding of broader financial systems. The FinEd50 coalition, backed by nonprofits and corporations, is also working to help.

If you live in a big city like New York, Chicago or Los Angeles, you will hear people talking about money and careers and investments wherever you go, but even anecdotal evidence doesn't necessarily mean that everyone is doing the same thing. In 2025, Bankrate released a national opinion poll that found money is, in fact, still a taboo subject.

It's tempting to extrapolate our successes or sacrifices and say, 'I did it. Why can't you?'

The appropriately named Bankrate Financial Taboos Survey concluded that 61% of U.S. adults said they would be uncomfortable talking about their bank-account balances with family members or close friends. Other reportedly sensitive topics, like credit-card debt and salaries, didn't fare much better.

In 2025, Congress expanded SNAP work requirements and narrowed some exemptions under the One Big Beautiful Bill Act. It expanded the number of adults subject to SNAP work requirements, and narrowed some exemptions and state waivers. Work-requirement exemptions for some groups - including certain homeless people, veterans and young adults formerly in foster care - were removed.

It's tempting to extrapolate our own successes or sacrifices and say, "I did it. Why can't you?" If we could have a do-over, I don't think there is one person who would say, "I would not do anything differently." Negative news sells, but I'm not sure counterfactual financial lessons always have the same effect. Our financial lives don't, as you suggest, exist in a classroom.

If they did, millions of people would be a lot better off.

By emailing your questions to The Moneyist or posting your dilemmas on The Moneyist Facebook group, you agree to have them published anonymously on MarketWatch.

More columns from Quentin Fottrell:

'I still don't have my MRI': My health insurer canceled my plan without warning. Is that legal?

My friend is terminally ill. Should she sell her rental home and pay $100,000 in capital gains?

'She says it's just money': My friend pays for everything. I should be grateful, but I can't stand her anymore.

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-Quentin Fottrell

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10-02-26 1100ET

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